Loved Singapore but....

After a stay of 3 months in Singapore - a time ; good enough to know the city well ; I confess I loved Singapore  for reasons more than those below ...

1) Comfort :A well developed city with all comforts of a developed country from ease of transportation to quality of things you get here.A fabulously well connected transportation system linked by trains and buses.
The internet speed and availability of 4G makes the country well connected to the world over internet.
2)Proximity to India and a decent paying job - I could afford the time and money for at least one trip to India a month.

3)People: I liked Singaporeans for their hospitality - smile , accommodating nature and cleanliness - not to mention their hardworking nature. Singaporeans slog in and out at work and is a tough competition for the Indians working with them.

4) Availability of Indian food : Food is one thing that you generally miss when on onsite assignment in foreign countries ; but in Singapore with a prominent Tamil population you get good south Indian food and  plenty of options at it.

5) Asian Culture where children and elderly are taken proper care of . Kids are pampered , punished and corrected. I felt it to be a good place to have your kids grow up. 

And you get a good choice of Indian schools so that kids don't suffer the 'syllabus shock' if you happen to move back to India. So Singapore in general is a good option to make quick money for those in the IT industry without compromising on your kids education or the fun of those family get togethers and marriages back in India.

Having said that ...it is time for me to take leave off the city for something better back in India.

Time to cuddle up with my husband and son for a peaceful good sleep...which I've been missing all these days.

Happened to see a 'note' written my mom on the last page of a diary ... I couldn't help taking it and kissing it all over in fact on every letter or number she had scribbled . It was a very generic note - a scribble of some numbers . The upsurge of emotions on sight of her handwriting in me was so intense and profound that I had absolute no control on my  actions ..neither on my tears.

Wishing all mothers good health and long life !

Change 2

My conviction : 'Being silent is the best solution to disagreements'. Realisation : not always and mostly not.

I always believed that keeping silent was the best solution to disagreements with people whether in professional or personal matters. And I chose to remain silent in most of the cases- this did help avoid unnecessary arguments but misled others to believe that I agreed to their opinion - notions. I ,  now strongly believe that more than being silent , it is important to get your views across - even though it might hurt the other person initially, they would know that you are not in consensus with their idea. And success in any meetings,encounters or negotiation lies in getting your view across to the other person and influencing them to change.

Another lighter change which I'm going to practice.

" SPEAK OUT when you do not agree "

Change 1

It has been long since I wrote something. They were many thoughts and topics that I wanted to write about.Could not. Reasons are many that I kept convincing myself to be true. But the fact is, I just could not write.

Finally,  after almost two years I've resolved to start scribbling..:) and to keep it going - for a  Change.

Change is something that I have spent lot of time and energy resisting. I have been so complacent with my way of being that I've resisted change vehemently for a  real long time now. Having developed a  sense of pride in having not changed for years together, it was in deed difficult for me to realize that it was time for me to change. And it is only after I attempted to change that I realized how difficult it is to change and how deep rooted my convictions are. Having resolved to change I am going ahead. 

What I'm referring to is a  change of THOUGHTS ..change of ATTITUDE to life.

Starting from the lighter ones , for example, I have been thinking that 'looks'  have no significance in life and what matters is only what you actually are ; something in reality,  is so relative that it can never be measured or quantified. The depth of this conviction would become clear if I say that I spent hardly 10 minutes a  day on my looks - way too below the average time spent by many. But I now understand that looks do matter - in developing a   first impression and in life where we meet people long enough only to create first impression it does matter to create a good first impression. You may call this articulation - Yes articulation to your favor-  for the good - is important. Many wouldn't agree...it took lot of time for me to agree too...

Stopping with this lighter one for now..:) Keep reading..Keep going..:)

With all due respect

Was just scanning through Sunday magazine of ‘The Hindu’ dated 26-Apr-09, when I was hooked at Vijay Nagaswami’s article ‘With all due respect’.
The article dealt with a train of thoughts that I have been thinking of lately- Respect and Love in a relationship. Any relationship whether it be those within a family, between friends or colleagues should have mutual respect as the foundation on which the relationship is to grow and flourish.
Including a link to the article:
http://www.hindu.com/mag/2009/04/26/stories/2009042650250600.htm

To all my F R I E N D S….!!!

At School,
I always had ears that listened to …
Hands to clap for me
Eyes that cried with mine..
Friends who took me for what I was .

In College,
There was always someone with me..
In spite of my claims of bravery to be alone..
And tolerated my indifference and arrogance
Friends who were there with me wherever I was .

At work,
There was always someone to hug me and say
“I love you the way you are even if you don’t like you”
And “you can do it” even when I was least confident.

Thanks a lot for loving me more than I can ever give back..
Thanks a lot for trusting me more than what I’m worthy of..
Thanks a lot for BEING THERE FOR ME..!!!!

Resolutions.....

Some Resolutions for the year ahead...It took me two full weeks to find out some meaningful resolutions for the year ahead..not that I was researching on it but was lazy...:)-Thought I would pen them down..( and also publish ..) so that I do not console myself with the excuse that only I knew of it..:)-
1. Read the complete bible once. There is online bible which has the chapters of Bible sorted out such that Bible can be read completely in 365 days
( http://www.biblegateway.com/resources/readingplans/index.php/today )
2. Learn and do Yoga: In fact, I went to join for the Yoga class here in office but it seems many had this in their New Year resolution and were faster than me to join. So they asked me to come and check in the beginning of next month... :(-
3. Read at least one book in a month and post the review of the same. Had this in my resolution of 2008 (though not the review part of it)..However could read (only) the below books.
· Jonathan Livingston Seagull- Richard Bach
· Dabbawallahs of Mumbai - K S Srinivas
· To Kill a Mocking bird - Harper Lee
. Tuesdays with Morrie -Mitch Albom
· The Namesake - Jhumpa Lahiri
· A thousand splendid suns - Khaled Hosseini
· 'Thalamurakal' - O V Vijayan
· 'Jeevithamenna Albhutham'
· Riot- Shashi Tharoor
· Anthem - Ayn Rand
· We the Living - Ayn Rand
( And I became a fan of Ayn Rand's ideas of Individual Freedom )
4. Learn a new language (Either German or Japanese)
5. Have a timetable in life.. Though it may be difficult to have one for the entire day , schedule at least the sleeping hours. And follow it on all days including Saturdays and Sundays...:)-
6. Join for a postgraduate course off-Campus or online . No idea of how I would implement it. Let’s see.
7. On the professional side: Pass the OCP exams in SQL,PL/SQL ,Advanced SQL and PL/SQL...
8. Learn to "Forget and Forgive" more...and keep smiling..:)-
and to greet at least 100 of my friends on their B'days..

......

നാവിന്‍ തുമ്പില്‍ വാക്കുകള്‍ തത്തി തത്തി വീഴുമ്പോഴും
കണ്ണുകള്‍ തുരുതുരാ സംസാരിക്കുന്നത് എന്ത് ?

കുഞ്ഞനുജത്തി നിനക്കായ്‌...

പ്രഭാത സൂര്യനെ പ്രതീക്ഷകള്‍ക്കായ്‌ കാത്തു നില്‍ക്കുമ്പോഴും ,
നിലാവുള്ള രാത്രിയില്‍ സങ്കടങ്ങളെ എടുക്കുവാന്‍ താമസിനോട് കേഴുമ്പോഴും,
ഞാന്‍ തനിയെ ആകുന്ന സമയങ്ങള്‍ ഒക്കെയും ...
കുഞ്ഞനുജത്തി , എന്‍റെ ഉള്ളിലെ സങ്കടങ്ങളില്‍ ഒന്നായി മാറുന്നത് എന്ത് നീ ?

കളിക്കാതെ പോയ കളികളോ ?
പാടാതെ പോയ പാട്ടുകളോ ?
പറയാതെ പോയ കഥകളോ ?
മോളെ, നിനക്കായ്‌ ഞാന്‍ സൂക്ഷിച്ചതോക്കെയും
കൊടുക്കേണ്ടത് ആര്‍ക്കെന്നു ചൊല്ലുമോ ?

ഉണ്ടായിരുന്നെങ്കില്‍ എന്ന് പലപ്പോഴും ആശിക്കുമ്പോഴും ,
ഇല്ല എന്ന് സമ്മതിക്കുവാന്‍ മടിക്കുന്നത് എന്ത് എന്‍ ഹൃദയം ?
നിന്‍ ദാനം അല്ലോ എന്‍ ജീവിതം എന്ന് ഓര്‍ക്കുമ്പോള്‍ ,
നന്ദിയോ പരിഭവമോ ...!!!

പെയ്യാതെ പോയ മഴയോ ?
വിടരാതെ പോയ പൂവോ ?

Renew the spirit of Childhood in us...!!!!!

Went to church here at Milton Keynes.It was the first time after coming here.There were hardly 20 people for the evening prayer.But it was a beautiful experience. One in the group said a prayer followed by hymns and songs.One prayer that had be thinking for a long time was
" Renew the spirit of childhood in us "
This is what is actually required in our lives I feel..and we are actually growing down with years with regard to many things.
Growing down with regard to 'Trusting others..', 'Adjusting to situations', 'Seeing people without prejudices' ,'Sharing our things' and the list will go on...
How easily we made up after the little fights that we had whether it be with the friends next door or with friends at school.We forgot the fights without letting them leave the slightest mark of bitterness in our minds.It was not forgiving but forgetting...
I feel children experience the special grace of God to forget things and incidents of bitterness or may be they just don't feel the bitterness.
We never bothered to enquire about the caste, religion or nationality of the friends we made in childhood.Because we were unaware of the differences that man made in his world around.The knowledge we attain of the castes,communities and religion as we grow up in life later become the prejudices we use to judge the people we meet in our lives.These differences later grow to become the sources of unhappiness in our lives.

Is the education we gain, knowledge we attain and money we earn worthy of these instincts of innocence we have in us ...Is a definite NO from me..!!!

Growing Up...? or Down ...?

“ As a child I dreamed of growing big,
Now , I dream of growing small,
Lucky are the ones who retain the child in them
Inspite of having lost their childhood ”

"If by bathing daily God could be realised
Sooner would I be a whale in the deep;
If by eating roots and fruits He could be known
Gladly would I choose the form of a goat;
If the counting of rosaries uncovered Him
I would say my prayers on mammoth beads;
If bowing before stone images unveiled Him
A flinty mountain I would humbly worship;
If by drinking milk God could be imbibed
Many calves and children would know Him;
If abandoning one's wife would summon God
Would not thousands be eunuchs ?
Mirabhai knows that to find the Divine One
The only indispensable is Love ."

One of Mirabhai's ecstatic songs translated by Swami Paramahamsa Yogananda

Nuclear Families becoming traditional....Oops!!!!

Attended a presentation on Retail 101( My new domain ) today at office .It was a wonderful session which gave us a feel of the Retail vertical...Walmart..Argos and the stuff but what caught my attention was a phrase " Traditional Nuclear Families" in one of the slides.Initially, when I saw it, I thought may be it is a Typo mistake ... but then from the discussion that followed I realised that it was just that I was still hooked up in the generation were joint families were traditional ... or may be I just dint know that even nuclear families had become traditional.
Where are we actually heading..?
I still remember very vividly the day we decided to move out of my ancestral home to the city for the convenience of my parents,both of whom are working .The loneliness I experienced after shifting to our new house is beyond what can be put in words . The little me looked forward to the weekends when I could get back home to be surrounded by my grandparents,uncles , aunties ,cousins and friends..The loneliness of the nuclear family itself was a big torture for me.And I feel pity for those unfortunate among us who have not experienced the comfort & love of sharing that flows in a joint family.I have heard of people telling that you will not get privacy in a joint family to look after your kids , your spouse ... but the fact is you get many people to look after you , your kids and spouse.Nothing may be your own..but then everything is yours.
Kids grow up learning the basic lessons of love and sharing.
Gone are the days to lament about the traditional joint families....when nuclear families themselves have become traditional.From what I understood from the session , nuclear families have become traditional in many developed countries ( Thanks to the late advent of everything developed in our country ) where parents and kids find it difficult to live together , to share their things and they move out deciding to stay alone.Human mind craving for space of its own.
The basic reason for all this is the absolute lack of love.Love for the people around you , Love for your parents ,for your spouse ,for your kids...
Human mind without love becomes selfish..first about ones own spouse and kids and with generation selfish about ones own individual self.

The habit of being happy.....

Today on my way to office in the Hyderabad MMTS happened to see an instance which reinforced to me that " Happiness endures more with those who are happy without it "...

The station was buzzling with people as is usual in the wee morning hours.It was thronged with working class men and women largely young IT professionals of which I too am a member though not by my choice but of the fate. This clan to which I belong can usually be identified by young souls with earphones plugged to their ears listening to someone at the other end or finding happiness in some distant source oblivious of the little sources of the happiness around.

I was looking around, a little disturbed since this was supposedly going to be my last official day in Hyderabad and Hyderabad gifted me with many blessings , a city which took me for what I am , without demanding any change what so ever from me.

I spotted a man with a harmonium squatting down on the platform ...It was obivious that the man was blind but he was happy..he radiated happiness all around..The smile on his face was original .. and he was singing to his hearts contend...I was forced to think on the sources of happiness ..

There are some people who are determined to be happy in spite of all that life has to offer.Some for whom happiness is not conditional but is more of a habit. And I have always felt that it is with our desires that we tend to become unhappy. And in the ability to count our blessings lies our happiness .

I tooked out the camera that I carried and clicked a pic of the happy soul.

"Happiness endures more with those who are happy without it "